The Reality of Normal
Original Post December 8, 2016 Tosha Gordon
After going through treatment and dealing with a cancer diagnosis, things change and that change is referred to as our “new normal”. I hate that term because it feels like something has been taken away, but in actuality, things have just shifted.
Maybe we ALL need to find our new normal. What fits YOU? Is there something that might feel better than it feels right now?
Discontent is where expectations fail to translate into reality. This is what gets you!! Birthdays, holidays, family events even Holiday tree cutting!! Realizing what our expectations are is half the battle. This is where that time to quiet our minds comes in. It helps us to make these realizations. I just suffered my own discontent over the weekend.
I love social media, but you really do have to keep it in check. We often don’t realize the expectations we are setting for ourselves, and therefore have trouble turning the discontent around. It sometimes seems that social media is setting the tone for “normal”, but it’s a very distorted reality!
My husband and my three boys and I did some tree shopping this weekend. It was after church Sunday morning and the kids just wanted to go home. They were mopey and following me around too close and GASP leaning on me and invading my personal space. I nearly lost it. We are shopping for a Christmas tree. You SHOULD be having fun. This is a hallmark moment, isn’t it?! Luckily my senses kicked in and I decided that my husband and I might sneak an opportunity to have a nice tree hunting experience alone. Problem avoided. We all remained calm and went home.
Embrace your inner Griswold.
TODAY as I flip through facebook with my morning coffee I realize that part of the reason I got upset shopping for a tree is that, what seems like EVERYONE, is out cutting their own trees, sipping hot cocoa and all happy happy happy. WELL! It was never our tradition. As a matter of fact, for years we had a fake tree. It snuck into my subconscious that this is a family occasion that we SHOULD be enjoying together. BUT it’s not OURs and we, for whatever reason, don’t particularly like it. SO, I choose happy, I choose content and I choose to free up that time doing what I perceived as something I SHOULD do and do something we wanted to do. We spent three nights in a row watching Christmas movies. We were lazy and together and I think we even created some memories of binge watching Santa Claus. I’m good with that.
Love,
Tosha
*Update...this was written last year before ZenDitty was launched. This year, we bought another fake tree! Bring on the Christmas movies!! :-) I hope you find the happy place in your holidays! xoxo
December 2023 update: I love this. I have been telling myself, “It’s just not our thing” a lot since I re-read this. It applies to way more than trees! ;-)